it's just so hard

I know you'll all be shocked, but I've been thinking about the patriarchy again. I was out with several of my bestest girl friends last weekend and heard all about their new boys and all the sex that they were having. I have to admit I was jealous since I will never again have a new boy in my life (boring old husband for me) and since the aforementioned husband is currently fighting the GWOT in the desserts of Iraq consequently I am having absolutely no sex either. Fast forward less than one week and somehow three quarters of the new boys discussed in this conversation had acted like total bafoons.

This outlandishly bad behavior on the part of these boys makes one wonder why women have to put up with such nonsense. I love and respect all of the ladies that told me their boy stories and have no doubt that they are all far superior to the idiot assholes that have wronged them. Why do men feel like they can or should act so ridiculously? You guessed it, the patriarchy. I'm serious. We live in a world dominated by images. Women are either sexual objects (who like to be mistreated) or they are ugly asexual bitches. We convince ourselves that for men to like us we need to be objects, sexual objects. To "win" this game of love, women need to be pleasing and look beautiful and somehow accustom ourselves to intolerable male behavior. After all we have been told our whole lives that we need men to take care of us and protect us and above all desire us.

I'm so proud to say that not one of the ladies that has been recently mistreated by a bafoonish boy is putting up with it. They are demanding better treatment and wisely taking a look around at the other fish in the sea. They know their value and for this Rosie and I salute you. Watch out degenerate men and crusaders for the patriarchy.

Oh and I love my husband because he is mercifully not a boy, degenerate, bafoon, idiot, asshole or crusader for the patriarchy.

complaint-free world

I just saw a segment on CBS News Sunday Morning about Rev. Will Bowen in Kansas City who has stated a campaign against complaining. This campaign is based on the idea that you can never complain your way to happiness. The challenge he presents to parishioners is to go 21 full days without complaining. Folks who participate wear a purple plastic bracelet to remind them that complaining only detracts from the pursuit of happiness. After this initial 21 days he believes a person will see that they are closer to accepting the world and people as they are and feel happier. His goal is to create a complaint-free society.

I have a friend who constantly raves about every aspect of her life. I find it somewhat creepy that she is the only person I have ever met who thinks everything and everyone is so wonderful. She feels compelled to talk about the constant joy she experiences with everyone she meets. I find myself not believing her, thinking she's delusional. I think I have heard her complain twice and both times she apologized for it and tried to rationalize her discontent to explain it away.

Rather than going to church today, Easter Sunday, I am contemplating what a complaint-free world would really look like. The Pollyanna side of my brain thinks what a great idea, but my skeptical side is all up in arms over this.

Pollyanna's arguments for:
We do spend a great deal of time and energy complaining, at least I do. I do not necessarily follow thru with all the threats to rectify the wrongs that I discuss during my rants. By complaining I am certainly not accepting people or situation for how they are. I grew up in a family where different always equated bad. By complaining am I just reifying negativity.

Skeptical side of my brain's arguments against:
Sometimes things just suck. It's true, they do. If we never allow ourselves to deconstruct our discontent, we will certainly never be able to work to ameliorate the situation that caused it or our feelings, right?

judgement call

I have noticed a rapid decline in my ability to judge appropriate from inappropriate. When I was a teacher, this distinction was easier to make because I made this decision multiple times a day, but withing a confined context--school. (Pushing and using bad words ,that's easy- inappropriate. Touching other people's things without permission-totally inappropriate. Peeing on the wall of the stall not in the toilet in the boy's bathroom--definitely inappropriate and disgusting as well and to this day I cannot figure out why someone would want to do this, but believe me little boys do.) Now that I'm out in the "real" world, it's way harder to know. I'll give some examples and perhaps they'll clarify my point.

List of things that I do that I'm pretty sure are questionable if not down right inappropriate:

-I have been known on occasion to curse in front of my class.
-I find myself standing way too close to men on the escalator because they smell oh so good and I have not seen (or smelled) my sweet husband for several months now.
-Help myself (translation, use what I need at the moment and also store some in my purse for future use) to Splenda packets at restaurants/coffee shops.
-Let the grass and weeds my yard in suburbia grow so long that people are beginning to wish I'd put a junk car there so my home could officially be known as the junky house on the block.
-I return or re-gift almost every gift people give me.
-I park on the wrong side of the road while I retrieve my mail from the mailbox.
-I use the fact that I walk really fast to cut off old people at the door of the post office and super market so I can be in front of them in line.

See? This is grey area.

childhood obesity

I now understand why there is an epidemic of childhood obesity in this country. It is literally the only time during daylight hours when kids shut their yaps (the caveat is that this quiet only occurs if you have been extremely crafty and found one of the five current foods they will eat without tears, complaints and perhaps thrown silver wear in protest).

Bottom line....kids, cute but a real pain in the ass.